Reading all previous old posts, which was posted 4-years ago

I was that immature and sensitive few years ago. 

I realise that you could not feel depress totally to everything that people told you. 

They might mis-judged you and misunderstand the meaning of your acts. 

Loneliness filled up my life actually and I really fall into minor depression as a student at that time. This is the first time of revealing. 

By that time, I do not really know the reason of being at Melbourne. I can persuade the same degree in Malaysia with a group of friends and families. 

But, I found the reason, which is more than one. 

Essentially, I have learnt how to take care of myself. Without a partner, I can still survive.  I know hw to organise and manage my life and works. 

I start to smile and laugh at the end. The truth is not that miserable. 

***

CFA exam will be sitting on next Saturday. Time runs out quickly and I am not fully ready. 

Turning on my study mode and pushing myself forward are necessary now. 

Sufferrrrrr........Holiday, where are you.

 

介绍一个超赞的播歌网

You can click the screenshot above and it will divert you to an assigned page. Enjoy random music and sometimes, you will discover the surprise of your day. 

Particularly, the songs being played at late night are more attractive. 

想了很多人生道理

Please allow me to write this post in Mandarin. Otherwise, the true meaning could not be delivered. 

1. 别逢人就说你的辛苦，因为关心你的会主动问你
2. 永远为自己留一条后路，因为你不知你几时会失去价值
3. 当你知道你没法改变她，就别改变，因为辛苦的只是你自己，而他还是那样
4. 不定时联系一些好朋友，他们都很愿意接你的电话，代表他们没忘了你
5. 当你还没清楚这个人，别掏心掏肺和他说，可能他永远不在意你说的
6. 自己要争气，伤心悲伤可以，一个晚上足够了，你不知道你何时离开这个世界，别浪费时间在那
7. 对于你所爱的，坦白和她说，也许她在等待，也许她只想放在一旁搁着，不管如何，你至少感觉得到，她想怎样
8. 面具是必要的在这个社会，只是要带上，就请你别让人看出他是一张面具，不是一张脸

我想，我好想放下了

The incident happened in 2 months ago. 

I thought I could not get out from it. In fact, it is not that hard when you have sufficient time. 

That's me, person who is more positive-minded. 

Sea diving really improve me a lot in all these. After diving, I feel that I am refreshed with a new set of life story. 

In the sea, the environment is so quite and silent. You are not able to talk, but, listen only. 

I told myself that I must leave all these negative matters on the seabed. I did for twice. 

Finally, I knew how to response to your message. Thanks for your caring.

I know that I am cruel in the message content. But, I never think want to waste the time and it is pointless when we are totally apart from each other. 

Give it a go when you know you cannot control it. 

Pics of our journey to Cairns

You're My Everything

最近迷上了这首曲, Everything

每个人都需要经过,认识,了解,原谅,分离

Being Busy with Work

I was busy with working in the past few days. 

The store's business was so busy recently with the excitement of iPhone 5S.

5c were so pity and have been staying at the back of store for many weeks.

Graduation Assignment is going to due next Friday. 

I gain more freedom after that. 

Some changes in my life soon...

Seem like everyone is dealing with the changes in the life everyday, including me. 

I have been surfing around internet to look for some permanent jobs in Malaysia. 

Surprisingly, there are a lot of job position has been available for fresh graduate. 

Customers and people ask me why not staying in Melbourne. I want but, I am not qualify. 

I have been going through decision making several times. I decided not to waste time and money at here for the residency and only look for the jobs after that. 

I understand that Malaysia is not even comparable to Australia. At least, it is my home country where I can never be a second class residents. 

PR is a attractive things. But, spending time with family is more valuable because you will not know when the family relationship can end (when one of them leave the world). 

I have made up my mind overnight. My housemate and me are going back to own country at the same time.

Melbourne, I will not come back to you in a shot time.

Malaysia, I will be back permanently for you. 

I know I am not belong to you anymore

Everything is concluded.

I say we have differences because we never know what is the thing each other looking for.

When it is so uncomfortable at the beginning, there is no way to give a start. 

***

Life starts to have some changes. I have to know how to confront with them. 

Since I am going to graduate soon, I have to get ready for the next stage of my life. 

Going to leave Melbourne in less than 3 months, I will miss this place because I have been spending 4.5 years at here. 

Melbourne is full of sadness, happiness and working moments.

But, I think that I can do better in Malaysia.

I really meet a very good Manager

Honestly, I meet a very good manager in my workplace. 

She is friendly and caring towards employees. 

I am not fast-learning person who is able to pick up quickly. 

I strive not to leave behind, but, I always cannot go beyond what my ability. 

I learnt a lot from her. The ways of managing people under you and the ways of handling the tough situation. 

I am going to leave my job in less than 3 month times. I know that this is the time I want to do better. 

Set a goal. Help boss earn more connection and help manager to lessen her work. 

I understand that people who give you tough is the group of improving you. Hopefully, they can stimulate you to realise your potential. 

Mrs A, Thanks for everything........

Uluru, wahruru

Finally, I have arrived Uluru, such a rural unpolluted place.

We plan to ride Camel, watch Galaxy and walk around Ayers Rock.

Everything is under our plan and hopefully, nothing goes wrong. 

Kangaroo and Crocodile Meats are served at this dessert place. 

How do I think about Adelaide?

Guys, I have come back to Adelaide for the third time. I cannot believe that I am here again after I have been saying not to return anymore.

At the first moment of arriving at the city, the city is so dead. There is no one walking on the street and it is difficult to find anyone about the directions.

I told myself that I want to try something different for this time.

On Monday, I went to Barossa Village. It is a hill with many vineyard. You can only find wine making at the hill, otherwise, you got no where to go.

We finally locate a family operated vineyard to have wine testing and then, purchase some wines. Two red and one White.

We drop by the Lavender farm as well. It is not a very huge farm. But, it sells delicious Lavender Scones. Gave it a try....

The whispering wall is so amazing. One person can talk to another person who is nearly few kilometer away from you. Such an natural speaker.

I really treat this trip as a journey of forgetting all unhappiness. When we are not ready, don't start a relationship.

When I feel alone, I like to stay in a space with people I do not know

Regarding the relationship, I never want to force after I have tried.

I cannot say that I have tried very hard to get her heart because we are so far apart.

I have no ways of demanding for love from a girl .

I pretend and cover my real feeling so that I can act more gentleman and generous in the sight of girl. 

I never reveal the truth of myself to a person I like. That is lack of sincerity as you said.

I do not know which way of talking to you because I fear that I will lose control of myself.

****

I have registered for CFA and start my revision period. 

No matter how demotivated it is, I need to have one reading each day to complete the schedule.

Kind of investment on expertise and the first time of supporting myself in education.

Dad and mum have given up a lots of valuable things on my education to succeed their son. 

I never want them to feel regret.

****

Life is not hard yet. Never stuck yourself in a corner because it won't solve the problem and clear trouble.

I strongly recommend a open heart for yourself. Accepting who you are and stop pressing yourself, you can find another source of happiness and satisfaction.

Never satisfy, you never gain value from life because you never feel happy on what you have.

Life can has plenty of sadness. But, it does not mean the full of your life.

Do this for me: open yourself more to others, as your bro, I never look at how thin you are

I just want to know how happy you are.

Love you, Sis

She said a right thing about me

I never know that someone can just exactly describe what I am doing. 

Confronting with something sad, I always tell myself that I am fine and alright. 

I never cure my wound and I choose to forget the pain temporarily.

When the wound is hurt again, I repeat the same process.

I thought that I learnt, but, I am not. 

At least, I know there is someone can interpret my mind, which is not Y....

对你，我会把你放在心上

Unexpectedly, I told you everything. I never plan so far....

I filled my time after that with sport, working and seeking jobs. 

As you said, I only pay attention to myself. 

Undeniable, I really feel relief after that. Hiding something you do not wish to is so far.

Calling you every time and hear your sound. I always have the intention of showing how much I miss you.

In the past few years, I have killed this thinking with tonnes of excuse. 

You never wrong. I am lack of sincerity and action. Everything is pale.

我只能说：没有刻骨铭心，哪来回忆不断

I am not death. I can feel and sense. At least, you are part of my life.

Simple romance is enough for me......

Could be Over, Could be Another Chance

I knew what you want. 

Due to my stay in Australia, I have nothing else I can do to impress you. 

I know it is bull shit to say all these but, I am not asking for excuse.

thanks for giving me a chance to have tell you what I have been hiding for a long period.